Hi there,

I have been perusing other blogs lately and have come upon a number of comments that have really surprised and disappointed me.  I feel strongly that this IF/RPL community should ONLY lift one another up. This is not a place for debate/ criticism or teaching lessons. This is a safe place to vent, be heard and gain strength to keep fighting. With this in mind, I wanted to share a few rules of thumb when commenting on someone’s blog. ( I do understand that those of you actually reading this are in my corner and are my people so probably would never need to read this but maybe you can share it with someone who does).

1. If you have to start a comment with ‘please don’t take this the wrong way but…’ then do NOT make the comment. This one kind of goes for in real life to. That disclaimer never actually works and it usually precedes something rude or not your business.

2. Do not tell others that ‘it may not be God’s plan’. This is offensive on every level and is usually said by someone who has three kids under three and can smugly make claims about ‘what God wants’.

3. Do your best not to make your own story what you think everyone should do and share it as such. Did you transfer three embryos and are so glad you did? Great. But don’t act like now everyone must transfer three to be happy. Sharing your own story and success can be great to help relate to others but don’t use it as the template upon which all others must use.

4.When in doubt just validate and support. We all want to feel just a little less alone, a little more heard and surrounded by love. Keep this in mind before pressing send.


Ok- thanks for letting me share. Call it hormones, call it sensitivity but negative or non supportive comments on other blogs send me into a protective rage these days. Thanks for letting me vent/ share. So much love to all of you.